Contributed by Info Guru Cindi Pearce
Do you want an all-out lavish wedding or would you be more comfortable (and your budget more receptive to) a smaller and more private affair?
Big doesn’t necessary mean better. Some of the loveliest and memorable weddings are done on a scaled-down budget with a lot of creative effort by the bride and her friends and family members. You do not have to have deep pockets to execute a beautiful wedding and reception. There are many questions you, the bride, will be confronted with and must answer. This is going to require some decisiveness on your behalf. Here are the top 10 bridal questions:
10. Sister-in-law?
Do I have to have my sister-in-law in my bridal party? Uhmmm …. This is tricky. If you really do not like her, or perhaps you are not close to her there is nothing carved in stone saying you HAVE to include her. However, she is going to be in your life forever more (maybe.) Weigh the pros and cons. Discuss this with the groom-to-be. If she’s his sister, he may really want her in the wedding. If your sis-in-law is married to your brother, maybe you won’t catch as much grief if you don’t ask her. (Gird your loins.)
9. White?
Do you have to wear white? No. That’s up to you although, traditionally, brides wear white even though most brides, particularly older ones, aren’t expected to be virginal. You can pretend to be so, if that’s important to you (but hide the Girls Gone Wild video.) Some brides are opting for electric colors —rich reds, vibrant blues – and some select the sherbet colors — frothy pale pink, for example, which is often referred as blush. Do what you want to do.
8. Rings?
Do we have to exchange wedding rings? No. If you don’t want to wear rings or can’t afford them, you are still married even without them. Some have resorted to using a band taken off of a cigar. In this case, hopefully the bride wasn’t expecting something more or that could lead to a nasty fight and there is nothing worse than a nasty fight right after saying, “I do.”
7. Bouquet tossing?
Do I have to do all that silly bouquet tossing and the garter thingamajig? Not if you don’t want to. It can be fun, though.
6. Hide out?
Is the world going to end if the groom sees me before the wedding? No, but your mother may have a heart attack.
5. Wait?
Can we postpone the honeymoon until we have some money and aren’t so exhausted? Of course.
4. Honor and obey?
Do I have to promise to honor and obey? No. You can tailor your vows however you want them to be. Of course, if you and your soon-to-be spouse can’t concur on this … there might be something rotten in Denmark.
3. Name?
Do I have to change my last name? No. No. No. This is ritual, not a law. Of course, if you and your soon-to-be spouse can’t agree on this it can be a huge issue. Discuss this well in advance of the wedding.
2. Change mind?
Can I change my mind and call it quits before I do the deed even if it’s at the last minute? Of course, but be ready for the fall out. You wouldn’t be the first (or last) runaway bride or groom. Deal with this as eloquently as possible. Do not up and disappear and leave no forwarding address. Notify the guests. Return wedding gifts. The engagement ring … some think you should return it, and others say ‘no.’
1. Take?
Do you take this man (woman) …? Well, do you? This is THE most important question you are ever going to answer. You should, ideally, already know the answer.